Helping your child adjust to change

I have been meaning to write for a while now but motherhood has had me questioning myself a lot lately. Look, I don’t doubt that I’m a good mother because that’s one of the few things I can confidently say that God blessed me with; the ability to patiently nurture and love my children! But rest assured that, that does not mean I do not have moments when I wonder if I am truly cut out for this “mom life”.

Quick update; the Cele munchkins have recently joined a new school, we had been on the waiting list since 2018 so we were very excited when we finally got a call back. Phopho started his previous crèche when he was a year and 3 months so I know all the teachers because we were raising the kids together and Thando joined when she turned one not by choice… nanny drama story for another day. Needless to say my kids saw the crèche as their second home, and Phopho is the kind of child that would come home with a star, everybody knew who he was and he had friends who were in his life since 2016 so leaving for him was a bit harder than it was for Thando.

He recently got into trouble because he could not express himself properly and resorted to pushing another child. For the first time we were called to the school, and he didn’t want us to leave when we dropped him off so because he was scared ☹️. So he went from very confident insecure to scared and lost.

When I spoke to him about the new school he told me the other kids say bad words. I felt his frustration and I realized he is discovering that he won’t always be protected but needs to learn that he still has to do the right thing even if the other person is not doing right by him. I must say this was a difficult concept to introduce to a 4 year old. So I prayed to God to give me strategies to help him adjust and to help him understand it’s not okay to hurt others even if we think they deserve it.

With God’s faithful help,we have been intentional about setting an example and reminding him, he is kind and he does not take pleasure in hurting others. It is still a work in progress but we have thankfully not heard of another incident, glory to God! I also started telling them stories related to the subject; like the story about Joseph and his jealous brothers, to which he always says “this story is ugly mama, because the brothers are not kind” and I respond with, I know but Joseph forgave them.

When I was tempted to google: “how to deal with a pre-schooler struggling to adjust to a new environment” the Holy Spirit would remind me that; ”God is the only One who can give me a tailor made solution for my baby because He created him”. So for those of you dealing with little ones that are adjusting to a new environment or any other change, be patient, give them a squeeze and a kiss when they fall apart and let them voice out their frustration and then reassure them it will pass. Lastly don’t forget to pray for a tailor made solution from the creator of the munchkins ❤️ ️.

With love


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Koki Mothoagae
27th Feb 2020 11:04

True we need tailor made solution from the creator. #PARENTING

27th Feb 2020 05:38

Thank you so much for this! God is our helper

Tumi Tjale
25th Feb 2020 14:45

The best advice ever! Raising kids is not an easy task. Good mother or not. It’s tough !