On our 8th anniversary, Lizzy asked for lessons learnt over the years so I thought let me type 8 things and while writing them I realised bullets will not do I needed to elaborate.
So here we are again doing what I love, writing…
This is the list:
1. Christ’s love for the church is the standard not other couples.
2. Yielding/submitting is to make sure you don’t lose your covering(it protects you).
4. Forgiveness is hard but necessary!
5. Children edify and grow your love capacity.
6. Nothing should come between you,God sees you as one -so when divided you are vulnerable.
7. Be committed to each others growth at all levels/stages.
8. Sex gets better and better with the years -keep going😂😂😂
“1. Christ’s love for the church is the standard not other couples:”
The reason I started with this number one is because I believe this is the core foundation for a successful marriage. It is in our nature to look for a “role” model to follow and emulate, so we look up to our parents, friends and tv stars. Over the years I have learnt that like me human beings make mistakes and they change their minds. God on the other hand is consistent and honours covenant unto death, “He is not man that He should change His mind”. Once I realised this I stopped being heartbroken over the news about separation and divorce, yes, I still get disappointed but I don’t use them as the benchmark as to whether or not our marriage stands a chance.
Christ’s commitment to the church always challenges me to want to do and be more to the one I vowed to love. Using human beings as the benchmark sets the standard very low, it is a terms and conditions apply, kind of love. Whereas Christ-like love says despite of …(selah). The world teaches a punitive love that gives you what you deserve, so you do things out of fear of what might happen if you don’t. The Christ-like love says I love you even if you don’t deserve it at the moment. It restores, it heals, it casts out all fear and covers a multitude of sins.
My husband doesn’t care what people think, it used to bother me but it doesn’t anymore. He has unconsciously delivered me from “ba tlo reng” syndrome. When I would always be trying to convince him to post something to prove to everyone how happy he was. He reminded me he will have to answer to God about how he treats me and that is what matters to him more than what my friends think of our marriage. I realised that it is easier to put up a show for your friends but God sees and hears everything even your thoughts. Don’t get me wrong we do have couples we like and admire but they are not the standard we are looking unto Jesus the author of LOVE.
I will break down the rest of the points in the coming weeks.